Adam's Secret
by Heiidii Babess x
Summary: Adam has a secret, but how long can he hide it? Especially from his nosy mates?
1. She'd Be There Now

**Adam's Secret**

**Please be nice it's my first fic!**

**Summary: Based on my favourite Casualty character Adam Trueman and how he copes with an eleven year old daughter, inside and outside work, maybe a little bit of romance too!**

**Rated: K**

**Part One: She'd be Outside Now**

It had been a long shift, all Adam wanted was to go with his colleagues for a pint but he knew he couldn't. He changed out of his scrubs and looked at the time on his watch, twenty past three, she'd be outside now, wouldn't she? He left the staffroom and was almost out the door when he heard someone shout,

"Adam!" He turned, it was Jessica, his heart started hammering as she came ever closer to him, she was inched away from his face now, if he leant in he could kiss her. But he knew better.

"You coming for a drink?" she asked looking up at him with a smile. He sighed,

"No, I can't not tonight." Her smile faded,

"Date?" he felt like laughing-if only she knew,

"No! But something like that." She shrugged but he noticed the look of disappointment cross her face,

"Ok. Have fun tonight." She strolled away. He really wanted to go for that pint with her. He pushed open the door and walked right into a group of his friends arguing over the first round. Zoe saw him,

"Hey, I know, Adam can pay for the first round." Adam laughed,

"I would but, prior engagements." He waded through the group and made his way to his car. It was parked out of sight of the gang, something he was grateful for because he was right she was there.

He wavy black hair covered the side of her face as she stared at her shoes. She looked up when she heard him coming her eyes met his. They were the exact same shape and colour. She picked her rucksack up off the ground and slung it over her shoulder. She had rolled her navy jumper sleeves up and undone her top button pulling her tie down in the process. Adam looked her up and down,

"I swear that's not how you went to school this morning. Is that the new way that eleven year olds wear their uniforms." The girl rolled her eyes,

"Everyone wears their uniform like this, well most people, I can usually get to lunch time and then I have to alter mine." She glanced down at her navy skirt that was just above her knees. He opened the car and she jumped in the passenger side.

"So, good day at work?" Adam laughed at her,

"Oh Addison, if only you knew, it was enjoyable to His Royal Highness Nick Jordan came in, it went down hill from there." Addison looked at him,

"What's this Jordan guy like he sounds a right eejit." Adam laughed as he started the engine,

"He just doesn't like me, anyway enough complaining, how was school?" Addison sighed,

"Oh the usual, English and Math were a breeze, then the new P.E teacher refused to call me Addy, and told me that she didn't approve of nicknames and that my parents probably wouldn't approve of teachers shortening my name either." Adam laughed,

"What did you say to that?" It was Addy's turn to laugh now,

"I told her that everyone called me Addy even my parents. Even then she still called me Addison, so I looked up her name in my homework diary, her name is Patricia Simmons, I asked her that if she didn't approve of me being called Addy then did she approve of people calling her 'Pat'? Then she got angry and told me not to ask stupid questions and that her name was Patricia. Then at the end of the lesson we were going to the changing rooms and this office lady came and said, 'Pat, there's someone in the office looking for you'!" She giggled as they stopped at a red light.

"You really need to stop being cheeky to teachers Addy." Adam told her.

"Oh come on! I bet you weren't an angel at school!" Addison fired back.

"Well no .." he started. Addison yelled,

"Yes! Exactly! And I like you am a Trueman and what was it my mum told me? Oh yes - Trueman's cant stay out of trouble!" Adam laughed at her as they turned into his street and pulled up outside his house.

" I suppose you can't help family traits. Come on then kiddo, I suppose you've got homework and I've got to make dinner." Addison jumped out the car.

"No homework tonight, it's Friday. Oh oh oh ! Can we have a take out cos it's Friday?" Adam considered,

"Well .. I don't know." he teased

"Oh please!"

"Fine we can have a take out of your choice."

"Yes! Thank you daddy!" Adam smiled as she bounded to the door and unlocked it.

He loved it when she called him Daddy and even though it meant he couldn't go for a drink he loved Addy living with him. Even though she as his secret that no one knew about. So far it had been three weeks and no one had yet noticed. He never went out for drinks after shifts anymore. He couldn't go to staff parties. He had a responsibility, he had to look after his daughter. He had promised her mum that he would and he had promised himself.

**So .... what did you think? Love it or hate it? R&R please xx **

**I promise to fill you in on what happened that he got landed with a kid if I get at least 3 reviews!**


	2. Why Did You Abandon Me?

_**3 weeks ago …**_

"_**Addison this is Adam, your dad." **_

_**Adam studied the girl in front of him, taking her in, he knew she was doing the same to him. She looked exactly like him, same eyes, same hair colour and from what he could tell from the way she was standing, the way she was looking at him, the way she was just being she had his 'nothing can touch me' attitude. The social worker in the corner broke the silence. **_

"_**Come Addison you've never met your dad before, surely there must be questions that you want to ask him?" Addison glared at the woman and looking Adam straight in the eyes asked what he wasn't expecting,**_

"_**Why did you abandon me?" She stared at him not breaking the gaze. Adam looked away,**_

"_**It wasn't my choice, I didn't want to, I wanted to be a dad, but your mum said you weren't mine." The girl laughed,**_

"_**Yeah my mum was always like that, selfish bitch." Adam looked at her,**_

"_**From what I remember of her she wasn't like that." The girl threw herself onto the couch and patted the space beside her, signalling for him to sit down.**_

"_**There is a lot you don't know about my mum. She didn't like anyone sticking their nose in when it came to how she brought me up. Everyone thought that I should know who my father was and she kept it from me to her final days. I don't think she wanted me to meet you, can't think why though, from first impressions you seem like a nice guy, but I suppose looks can be deceiving." Shrugging the girl looked to Adam again,**_

"_**Anyway, you must know all about me, my lovely social worker will have seen to that, so tell me about you, and considering we are blood related I want to know everything." Adam laughed at her but before he could speak the social worker in the corner butted in,**_

"_**Now Addison don't be too nosy .." Addison rolled her eyes,**_

"_**Okay for the last time, my name is Addy and if I want to be nosy I'll be nosy and considering this is some sort of family reunion and your not family could you kindly leave the room?" The social worker sighed at the girl and left the room. Adam had never met someone so like him. That was the kind of thing he would have said and the way she said it - the cheek and sense of authority in her voice just screamed "TRUEMAN" at him. He looked at the girl - his daughter - again and found she was staring up at him expectantly.**_

"_**Oh yeah, about me, well there isn't a lot to tell really. My parents died in a car crash when I was eight, I have a little brother Alex who ended up in a wheelchair because of the accident and an older sister Anna who wasn't involved, I haven't seen them much since I left university, I lived with my dad's parents until I got a place of my own - they're dead now. I'm a doctor in Holby ED and I am not married, have no girlfriend and I have an eleven year old daughter called Addy." Addy laughed,**_

"_**So what did they tell you about me? The social workers?" Adam shrugged,**_

"_**Not much really, just that you were born early. Raised by your mum and her parents that your grandparents moved to Spain and a few years later your mum died of a drugs over dose." The girl kicked the table in front of her,**_

"_**They're useless they miss out all the good bits. My mum and grandparents practically neglected me. My grandparents fled to Spain two years ago after the cops found out they were dealers and my mum was a heroin addict, was one since I was about five, she got so depressed when her parents left she decided to top herself. Oh I forgot when my mum got high she used to slap me about - got harder as I got older though. She successfully broke my arm three times, broke a few legs and I fell over the flat balcony trying to run away and broke my legs. I needed surgery then." She pushed down her school socks showing off some impressive scars. Adam winced,**_

"_**Your mum certainly changed." He looked at the little girl and saw she was starting to cry. "Hey don't cry! It'll be okay you have me now, I'll look after you I promised your mum and now I've promised you." The girl was sobbing now, **_

"_**But it was all my fault, mum said if I hadn't been born she wouldn't have been an addict to drugs and alcohol she said I drove her to it and her last boyfriend - the one she was dating when she died- told me at the funeral that I killed her because I was born." Adam pulled her close and whispered in her ear,**_

"_**No no no. It wasn't your fault none of it was, you cant help being born. I love you, I'm sure your mum did to in her own way." he stopped and looked Addy in the eyes, "I know we've only just met, but I don't like the idea of my daughter staying in a Children's Home so I've arranged to take you home with me, to your new home - if you want to stay." Addy wiped her eyes and smiled.**_

"_**I'd like that very much. I won't be a bother will I?" Adam chuckled and ruffled her hair,**_

"_**Of course not, you're my daughter and I love you." She snuggled up against him and started sobbing again,**_

"_**I can't believe you care so much," she stopped sobbing and wiped her eyes, "Am I coming with you now?" Adam stood up,**_

"_**You better start packing." The excited girl ran for the door and pounded up the stairs. Adam didn't notice the social worker enter the room again.**_

"_**Addy's a handful. I hope you know what you're doing, there's a lot of her mother in her, right now was a prime example, the cheek she gave me, that's what to expect." Adam chuckled,**_

"_**She gets that from me not her mum, she reminds me of what I was like at her age." He looked at the social worker, "Eleven, right? She's eleven right?" The woman nodded as heavy steps could be heard on the stairs and Addy appeared in the door way,**_

"_**Can we leave now?"**_


	3. The Jessica Situation

**I'm back again! I just wanted to get this posted quickly so I can work on the next chapter, I actually have to idea where this is headed. Unfortunately I own nothing except Addison, Anna and three boys as they are just something that emerged from my imagination. Everyone else belongs to the BBC !**

**Chapter 3:**

**The Jessica Situation**

Adam allowed his thoughts to drift back to the present as he watched the little girl in his living room bobbing her head animatedly listening to her new iPod Touch - a gift from her Uncle Alex. He remembered the reaction when Alex handed her the box. She had been totally surprised, she obviously hadn't been used to expensive gifts, she still hadn't stopped thanking Alex every time she saw him. She still had to meet Anna. He smiled at the thought of what Anna would give her - clothes and shoes, that was Anna's style and she would love shopping for a girl for once and not for her three boys,

"Hey, daydreamer, can you here me?" Addy pulled her ear phones out of her ears,

"I can now, shoot," she looked round at him.

"Would you mind terribly if I went into work tomorrow? I have to do an extra shift so I can take the day off for your Carol Concert at school." Addy nodded,

"I don't mind but will you be leaving me here?" Adam looked incredulous,

"No way! Your far to young! Your mum might have done it but I'm not doing it! No, I'm dropping you round at uncle Alex's place at around ten, I should probably be finished about five, Alex is having Anna and the boys round for tea." Addy nodded, she stood up and walked over to the breakfast bar her dad was currently leaning on,

"What are the boys like? You know my cousins," she gave him that all to familiar questioning look. Adam though about it,

"I haven't seen the boys in about ten months, since last Christmas, but Aaron is twelve he's really sporty and he's captain of the school football team. Then there is Callum, he's nine and a bit of a computer geek, he loves his PS2 and always hogs the computer which annoys his older brother and parents, but he's really a lovely boy. The youngest is my favourite though, Liam's five, he is really quiet and cute, he loves playing with action figures, he reminds us - Anna and I - of Alex when he was five, that's why everyone molly coddles him, we don't want him in a wheel chair like the real Alex, but anyway, Alex wouldn't be Alex if he wasn't in his chair." Adam sighed, "The food will be here soon and I thought I could take you to the ice cream parlour after dinner as an apology for having to work tomorrow." Addy smiled,

"You don't have to you know, I understand that you have to work and I'm sure I'm going to have fun tomorrow." The door bell rang and Adam went to get it, but on his way a piece of paper fell from his pocket. Addy picked it up and went to the couch to read it, it was a poster,

**ED Christmas Party**

**23****rd**** December 2008 **

**From 8pm onwards**

**Be There or be square**

**Love Kelsey and Jay x**

Suddenly her dad was calling her to come get her dinner, shoving the poster down the side of the couch she danced into the kitchen and sat at the breakfast bar,

"So going to the ED Christmas Party this year?" She looked him straight in the eyes.

"I don't think I can seeing as I have an eleven year old to look after and I don't have a sitter." Addy looked horror stricken,

"Your not going? That's insane! I can look after myself and it's only for one night!" Adam laughed at her,

"Nice try kiddo but your not staying on your own," he thought about it, "And I'm not asking Alex to watch you again!" Addy sighed,

"Why do you have to be so difficult?" Adam laughed again.

"I don't understand why I am arguing with my eleven year old about why I am not going to a stupid party." Addy glared at him,

"Because I want you to have fun! I don't want you to think that you cant have a social life because I'm here! You get it easier than most parents! You don't have the sleepless nights you get with a baby - you get the eleven year old who can feed and clothe herself and sleep through the night!" Adam sighed,

"You know you put up a very hard argument, if its what you want and you behave tomorrow for Alex, I may ask him or maybe Anna depending on how you like the boys to keep an eye on you over night, so I don't stumble in drunk and freak you out." Addy smiled triumphantly, she had done it again, she could be very persuasive when she wanted to be, and with someone as similar as her she knew exactly how he worked, but it would be selfish to take advantage of him all the time -just for small things she noted in her head.

She quickly finished her dinner and waited patiently for Adam to finish,

"Ready to go get ice cream?" Adam asked once he finished. Addy smiled and grabbed her coat and ran out the door.

Ten minutes later they were parked outside the parlour. Adam took the keys out the ignition but as he was about to get out Addy stopped him,

"Do you know her? I saw her outside the ED yesterday." Adam followed her gaze and rested his eyes on none other than the Anderson family- Sean, Jessica, Lucas and Amelia - sitting at a window booth inside the ice cream parlour. Adam's jaw dropped,

"That's Jessica, she works as a nurse in the ED. Oh no, we have a problem." Addison rolled her eyes,

"You haven't got round to telling your mates about me yet, have you?" Adam grinned weakly,

"It's okay, I'll call you Uncle Adam and we'll pretend I'm your cousin's daughter."

"You are a genius, right then let's get this over with." The got out the car and Addison trailed behind him into the parlour. Adam stopped at the counter,

"Right Addison what do you fancy? I'm going to have 2 scoops of strawberry and 2 scoops of chocolate." The girl behind the counter started putting Adam's order together as Addison considered her choices, she glanced quickly at the Anderson's and noticed she had Jessica's full attention, she could call him dad, but she knew better.

"Can I have anything Uncle Adam?" He nodded at her, "Well then, I'll have .. Two scoops of the fudge ice cream and two scoops of vanilla as well please." She smiled sweetly and then danced off to find a table, deliberately picking the booth right next to the Anderson's. Adam noticed and cringed, this girl was going to be the death of him. He walked by with the bowls of ice cream in his hands, it was Lucas who spoke to him,

"Hello, Mr Adam!" Lucas smiled at him.

"Hey Lucas, Amelia, Jess, Sean." He nodded at them. And was about to leave when Addy appeared at his side.

"Who's this?" Jessica asked with a smile giving Adam a warm look - one that wasnt missed be Miss Addison Trueman.

"I'm Addison or Addy preferably. I'm his niece." She gave the whole family a smile and grabbed Adam's arm, "Can we go eat now, the ice cream is melting." Adam gave a parting smile and sat down with Addy in a far away table where she had decided to relocate to. As soon as he sat across from her she laughed,

"You are so busted!" Adam looked startled,

"What?"

"I saw the look you gave her, you like her and from what I saw she likes you to!" Adam shook his head,

"Don't talk rubbish! She has a family- a husband! She's off limits Alex said so." Addy raised he eyebrows,

"Since when do you listen to Alex? And by the way, you called her Jess. If your just work mates then why did you shorten her name? When I'm waiting on you, I hear things and the only one I have heard calling her Jess is that _thing_ she calls a husband." She noticed he was going to hit her with a come back, "Lets talk about something else." The chat dwindled from school, to TV, to football, to Adam's work, all the while steering clear of the Jessica situation as Addy had christened it.

On her way out of the parlour behind Adam she made up her mind - she was going to sort the situation out.

**So what did you think?? Good/Bad? Shall I update? It's my longest yet and I do have a 4th chapter planned. **

**Next: Addy meets Anna and the boys. Will she have her way in getting Adam to the Christmas party? R&R and you shall find otu!!**


	4. She's My Daughter

**Hey! I'm back again! Sorry it's taken a while, I didnt know where to go with this, there were so many possible routes. This one involves an accident and Adam&Jessica. It isnt the best so criticism would be good but I tried and I have a good way to continue this story but ideas would be great! xx Thanks for reading xx**

_FLASHBACK_

"_She'll go over board with this Adam I'm telling you, Anna is going to adore her and no doubt she'll have bought her a whole shops worth of clothes and shoes. You know what Anna's like." Adam laughed at his brother,_

"_You can't talk you bought her an iPod Touch, that must have burned a hole in your wallet. You're probably right though but you can worry about how much Anna has bought Addy because I have to go to work." He peered round the living room door,_

"_I'll see you at the ED at half past eight Addy, okay?" _

"_Okay dad, half eight it is."_

_END OF FLASHBACK_

The sight in front of him was to much to bear, the car in front of him was a mangled wreck. They had just pulled his sister and two of her boys out of it but he knew there were two people missing - Addy and Liam.

His vision began to blur he realised he was crying.

"Where are you Addy? He asked himself in a whisper. Suddenly he was running through the trees at the side of the road, yelling for Addy, for Liam, pleading with himself for them to be okay. He had been running for a while now but stopping to catch his breath he heard a quiet sobbing. He started running towards the sound and what he saw he knew he wouldn't forget - ever.

Liam was sobbing over Addy, her top was covered in blood, her arm was at an odd angle and her leg was bleeding fast, how had she gotten this far from the road? How could she have walked? He ran over to the pair.

"Liam run back to the road and yell for help, make sure at least two people follow you." Recognising his Uncle's voice Liam took off running as fast as he could.

"Dad?" A weak voice met his ears.

"Addy, baby, it's okay everything's going to be alright," he brushed her hair back from her face with his hand, "Just stay still." He took his jacket of tying it tightly round the top of her leg to try and stop her wound from bleeding. He sat beside her comforting her as best he could. He felt like a failure, he had messed up big time, what would her mum have thought? He heard footsteps hurrying towards them, he looked at his daughter,

"I'm sorry dad, I should have stayed with Alex, I shouldn't be here, I should have listened to you," her eyes slid shut and refused to open again.

"Addy wake up, please wake up!"

_FLASBACK_

"_Dad please! I'll be good!"_

"_Addy, I don't know, maybe you should wait, I'll take you to Anna's another time, you'll see her again, stay with Alex please."_

"_But dad! Liam wants to show me his new army men!"_

"_Addy stop this, your staying with Alex end of!"_

"_But Anna said I could go to hers I'll still be waiting for you at half eight!"_

"_Do you know what? Fine go, I'm not in an arguing mood but be good and don't stress your aunt out!"_

"_Thank you daddy I love you!"_

"_I love you to you spoilt brat."_

_END OF FLASH BACK_

The resus doors burst open,

"What do we have?" Nick Jordan asked the paramedics.

The words coming from Dixie's mouth sounded like Mandarin to Adam, he felt helpless. He couldn't stand seeing her like this, covered in blood, weak, helpless. She was his baby, his world - or what was left of it that hadn't crumbled around him.

"Dr Trueman, your help would be much appreciated over here with your - niece? Cousin?" Adam blinked, it was now or never. He made his way over pulling on gloves and an apron.

"She's my daughter." The people in resus seemed to freeze, all eyes were looking from him to the girl on the bed, "Is there any reason why I have everyone's attention when we have an ill patient here?"

He worked and he worked hard, the pressure was getting to him, warm tears began to spill down his face.

"Dr Trueman - Adam! That's enough take a break, I can cope on my own now." Nick's voice floated into his jumble of thoughts. All most zombie like he removed his blood stained apron and gloves, dazed, his mind wandered to the unthinkable - what of she didn't make it? No he couldn't think like that. Hadn't she proved already proved she was a fighter? All the social worker had told him about her being extremely premature - 14 weeks wasn't it? - came back to him.

"The odds were stacked against her - but she proved them all wrong, those doctors had probably never encountered a child like your Addy. Tell her to do one thing and she'll do the opposite."

She'll be fine, he decided. He sat down staring into space, his mind still a jumble of thoughts. The staffroom was unusually quiet - then Jessica came in. Her face was stained with tears and she looked terrible. He forgot his own problems for a minute and concentrated on her.

"Jess? Are you okay?" She spun round to look at who was talking.

"No, I don't know what to do anymore - me and Sean are finished. The kids are with my mum, we have no where to go, I can't stay with my mum and dad forever. The kids are so confused they don't understand why mummy and daddy were shouting about -about .." She dissolved into tears. Adam stood up and wrapped his arms around her, she didn't complain she just melted into him.

"Shh, It's going to be okay. I'm here for you Jess." She smiled up at him,

"I heard about what happened in resus - why didn't you say in the ice cream place? It's nice to know we have one more thing in common!" Adam sighed.

"I didn't know how everyone would react. Anyway, why would Sean leave you and the kids? I mean, your going to have his baby soon, shouldn't he be happy?" Jessica suddenly shied away.

"Its - Its not Sean's baby." She looked at him pleadingly hoping he would understand what she was saying.

"Its - the baby - it isn't mine is it?" He was dumbstruck, he didn't know what to say. She just nodded at him, more tears spilling down her cheeks,

"He found out and went mad, he left this morning. The kids didn't know what was happening, its not fair on them but life isn't fair and I wasn't happy -so I told him. There's only one man in this entire world who makes me happy. And it's you - I love you Adam." He tightened his hold on her.

"I love you Jess, I never stopped loving you." He leaned down to kiss her - and the door banged open.

"Adam - Addy's awake and asking for you." Alice stood smiling at the door - she took in the scene and cringed. "Did I interrupt something? Sorry." She closed the door and walked away bright red. Jess laughed.

"Go! Addy needs you. I'm not going anywhere." He grinned and ran out the door. He was suddenly extremely happy - the happiest he'd been since he found out he had a daughter.

Addy was alive. He was going to be a dad - again. And he had Jessica and two potential step kids. It would take a while but was he going to get his happily ever after??

**I couldn't kill Addy, did you think I would? R&R please! Next part - Addy gets better and Adam and Jessica start over. :D If you want the next part quickly press the magic green button!! xx**


	5. In Hell With Mum

**This took longer than expected but I got it up in the end. I'm actually very proud of it but stil criticism is good! It's from Addy's POV. Hope you enjoy! xx**

**Chapter 5:**

**In Hell With Mum**

"_Addy? Addy wake up babes, it's mum." I saw her. Bleach blonde hair sitting poker straight on her shoulders. I squeezed my eyes shut praying for her to go away. Hadn't she put me through enough already? _

"_I'm sorry baby, for leaving you, I shouldn't have done it. Now your stuck with your good for nothing father." My eyes snapped open, I could feel my cheeks burning with anger._

"_Don't you say that about my dad! He's the best thing that ever happened to me! Him and his brother and sister! They're my family! Your dead, I don't need you anymore! I never needed you!" She grinned evilly the look that through my childhood so far I had learned to dread._

"_Addy darling, I'm not the only one who's dead, your dead too." I screamed, for my dad, for Alex, Anna anybody. Was this hell? I screamed louder, I didn't want to be dead, I didn't want to be stuck with my mother for all eternity, it wasn't time for me to die - yet._

"Addy please don't be dead, I didn't mean for mummy to crash the car please forgive me!" I could here a familiar voice - Liam's voice. Thank God, that must make me alive. Everything around me blurred, my arm hurt like hell - what a bad comparison - and I could feel something warm and sticky oozing down my leg.

"Liam? Liam it's okay we're going to be okay." But nothing I said could calm him. He was sure he was going to prison because he was so sure it was his fault that the car had crashed - the car had crashed? Why didn't I remember? - and the police were going to take him to jail. I groaned - man that kid watched to many cop movies. Finally he broke, he started kicking the door beside him - well above him now the car was on its side. It gave in and swung open and he climbed out.

"Liam stop! No! Come back!" I glanced around me, everyone else - Anna, Aaron, Callum - was unconscious. I didn't have time to wait. Ignoring the agony that I felt when I put weight on my leg I got out and ran after Liam. I turned round only once and saw the car. It was a write off, dented and smashed, the other car - I don't know how it got there - it must have ploughed into ours, had no driver although the driver's door was wide open. I began running after Liam through the thick trees at the roadside. I could hear him sobbing a bit ahead. I could hear sirens too - I'd never been so glad to hear an ambulance they were normally a bad sign.

I ran on every step making the pain worse, in both my arm and leg. He finally stopped in a clearing not to far from the roadside. He was crumpled into a ball and he was sobbing harder than ever.

"S'ok Lee, everything's gonna be fine." I fell to the ground beside him.

"Addy! No don't! Wake up Addy don't leave me!" My energy was gone, my will power zapped from me. I let the darkness consume me but instantaneously regretted it.

"_Welcome back princess, I thought you'd really gone back to the land of the living - shame, your dad is going to miss you when you die. I'm going to love watching him suffer. Maybe then he'll understand how much agony he put me through when he got me knocked up. Oh! And he'll find your crumpled body next to that brat Liam and he will hate himself for letting you get in that car." Mum had a smug grin on her face, the kind of grin I knew not to take seriously._

"_I'm not dead - if I were dead then you wouldn't be here, your in hell. I f I was dead my Nan and Papa Trueman would be here, they were good people and good people like children who died before their time go to heaven - isn't that what my catholic upbringing taught me? Isn't that what you told me when you lost Mark's baby? That the baby would go to heaven with all the good people?" I saw the anger in her eyes- she never did like it when I answered back. I screamed this time in pain, I felt something pain in my leg and I was pulled back to the darkness - again. _

"Dad?" His eyes met mine, he looked so worried,

"Addy, baby, it's okay everything's going to be alright," he brushed my hair back from my face with his hand, "Just stay still." He took his luminous jacket off and tied it around the top of my leg to stop the bleeding. He sat beside me and held my hand, he was shaking just as scared as I was, I wanted to make him stop worrying but I couldn't make myself speak, not with my throat killing me and the trees and bushes swirling around like I was on some demented tea cups ride at a theme park. I felt water on my skin, but it wasn't raining. Then I saw what it was - dad was crying. I heard footsteps and he quickly wiped away the tears on his cheeks - typical dad to pretend he wasn't really crying, just like me when my mum died. I would find myself crying just because I wouldn't see her again - even though I was half glad she wasn't there to shout and blame and slap me. I knew that I missed her in a way because she was my mum and for some strange reason I loved her despite what she had said about my family and how she treated me I loved her in some small way. The footsteps got closer and I began to hear voices, I knew I would be okay now so using all the strength I had left I spoke to him I spoke to my dad,

"I'm sorry dad, I should have stayed with Alex, I shouldn't't be here, I should have listened to you," my eyes slid shut again and even though I struggled desperately they wouldn't open. All I knew was that he was begging me to wake up.

"_You did it again!" Shit! I was back in hell with mum. "You need to choose! Stop coming and going as you please. You are so selfish! When are you going to realise you cant have both worlds! You have to choose now! Me and death or Adam Trueman -your dad -and life. I felt tears stinging in my eyes. _

"_Why did you have to do it mum? Why did you have to die and leave me on my own all those months? Only telling me through a birthday card you left with Mark who my dad was and that you were sorry! Am I not good enough a daughter? Is that why you deliberately topped yourself? What did I do wrong?!" I met her gaze and saw her eyes soften, a lone tear began falling down her cheek. I realised I standing, leaning against a wall. _

"_Oh Addy, Addison Alexandra Trueman, you did nothing wrong, I wasn't a good mum and I should never have left you or kept who your dad was from you and you must understand I am truly sorry, forgive me, come with me to heaven and we can start all over." She was all out sobbing now but where had I seen this before? Oh yes the 'I'm so sorry' act. The one she performed every time she had to run from dealers she owed cash to or a psychotic druggie ex who wanted her dead. That's where I'd seen it before. What made this time any different? Maybe that I was in some sort of dream world where anything was possible? Because I was actually dead now? Should I believe her against my better judgement? Leave behind my dad, my aunt, uncle and cousins? I knew what I had to do, but not how to do it, I took a deep breath,_

"_I don't care how sorry you are, I'm not going to heaven, I'm going home to my dad where I belong. I love you mum I really do but not enough to give up my life after what you put me through. I love my dad more than I have or ever will love you. I trust him and I could never hurt him like that - like you hurt me." The anger was back she was back to Miss Bitch mode. Her face almost turned purple,_

"_Fine! Have it your way you spoilt brat! You rot on Earth with that Trueman arse, your no daughter of mine!" She vanished and the world around me to, I was finally going home for good._

The faint beeping of machines began to get louder and I slowly opened my eyes. There was loads of people in the room. A woman with a kind smile and a badge that read Tess called out.

"Mr Jordan she's awake." I heard shoes squeaking on a polished floor and suddenly there was a weird guy standing above me.

"Well miss Trueman you certainly have your dad worried! Although a broken arm, a cut leg and concussion is such an easy let off." He smiled at me. I decided I liked him. He wasn't at all like I expected my dad's boss to be my previous impression from my dad's accounts was that he was a total prat. My dad must piss him off. Or maybe a bit of both.

"Can I see my dad?" he smiled at me again and the nurse adjusted my bed so that I was sitting up. He called to an anxious looking woman at the door.

"Alice could you possibly find Dr Trueman?" she dashed from the room and came back moments later her face bright red my dad almost skipping behind her.

"Hey kiddo! Welcome back! I thought I'd lost you!" He wrapped his arms around me squeezing me tight but being careful of my arm. The resus began clearing.

"I'm glad to dad! I missed you. Is everyone else okay?" He nodded at me.

"Anna and the boys are fine, minor concussion but they are all going home in the morning, Liam is at home with his dad right now. I had to convince Alex that you were okay so he didn't come rushing in here he was really worried - we all were." I nodded at him to say I understood. I changed the subject,

"How's everyone in the ED today then? I am especially interested in a certain nurse called Jessica." He laughed at me but then suddenly went all serious on me. Oops, what had I done?

"Remember you met Jessica and you jumped to the conclusion that I loved her?" I nodded. "Well, you were right we had a fling behind her husbands back and well I kind of got her knocked up." My eyes could have popped out I was so happy.

"Does that mean that I'm going to have a little brother or sister?" I suddenly was very excited.

"He laughed at me, erm try a brother and a sister, then a baby." I was suddenly grinning like the Cheshire cat.

"Amelia and Lucas are coming to stay with us?! It's a good thing you got a bigger place since I arrived then!" He knew how excited I was but he had to ruin the moment.

"You need to rest, too much excitement and you could make yourself ill. Anyway, Jess is going to get Amelia and Lucas from her mum's so I have to give her the keys to the house. I'll be right back I promise."

He ran from resus and I sat back grinning - it may not have been my best day or dad's for that matter but in a way it had been very productive.

A brother, a sister, a step-mum and a new baby on the way! My life with my dad got better everyday!

**R&R for next chapter please xxx**


	6. Valuable Gossip

**I'm sorry it took so long but here it is, part six. Once again I own nothing, thanks for the comments and I hope you didnt give up on me ever posting again!**

**Chapter 6:**

**Valuable Gossip**

The resus doors swung shut and Addy relaxed onto the pillows behind her and squeezed her eyes shut. So much had happened in such a short time. She had woken up that morning an only child living in a single parent family, she would be going home the next day to a new mum, a little brother and sister and in the near future she would be a big sister -again. She could hear whispers outside the doors as Mr Jordan strode in and gave her a smile.

"Ignore them they're just being nosey."

"Oh I don't mind," Addy replied, "I just wished they wouldn't stare, I wouldn't care if they asked me stuff."

Jordan laughed, "If they heard that you would never be left alone." The girl gave a one armed shrug. "Have it your way then Miss Trueman." He paused for a second, "Kelsey, Jay don't you know that staring is rude? If you want to know something I'm sure Miss Trueman will answer your questions - within decency of course." Kelsey and Jay edged through the door and smiled at the little girl.

"Hey," Kelsey spoke first and Addy waved back and Kelsey continued. "So how long you been a secret .. I mean, living with Adam." Addy giggled.

"3 weeks, did you notice anything or is this the first time you realised he had stopped going for drinks?" They both nodded at her. Addy eyed them seriously, "Anything else or are you just going to stand and stare?" Jay jumped slightly at the Adam-like come comment.

"So what's it like living with the famous Adam Trueman?"

"I like it, it's better than where I was before - not telling you where by the way - and he managed to get me into a better school, one near here, his family is the best though, my uncle Alex bought me an iPod Touch as a homecoming present and my Aunt Anna bought me like a shop full of clothes and shoes." Kelsey looked at Jay wondering how he had got an answer like that from the girl. She took a deep breath trying to think of something that would lead to valuable gossip.

"Is there any truth in the rumour that your dad is the father of a nurse that works here's baby?" Addy took a breath as she went to respond but a wave of pain ripped through her rib cage and she cried out clutching her side. Jordan was over in seconds.

"What's wrong?" She pushed harder on her side, "Let me take a look." He prised her hands away examined her side, "Kelsey, we need an x-ray Jay find doctor Truman and tell him to get his backside in here. I don't care what he's doing. Addy you need to stay very still for me" The girl's breathing became difficult and faster.

"Can't breath, help me," Kelsey placed a mask over her mouth and nose and patted her head.

"Everything's going to be fine Addy, Mr Jordan will make everything better." Suddenly she was panicking,

"I want my dad! I want my dad!" She started coughing and the room stood still as the machine next to her stopped its comforting rhythm.

"She's arrested, get her on her back, Kelsey bag her," Jordan yelled out orders while he began chest compressions and more nursing staff ran into the room, "Tess, I need adrenaline, Jay any luck finding doctor Trueman?" Everyone was running around and Jay called back over the madness,

"I can't find him anywhere. I'll have to page him."

_Elsewhere …_

The resus doors swung shut behind him as Adam hurried off to find Jessica. Like promised she was waiting in the staffroom. She no longer had tears running down her cheeks and she looked so happy. She had changed out of her scrubs and her bump was much more noticeable. Adam smiled at her,

"My keys are in my office, want to come?" She nodded and followed him through the ED and up to his office. He unlocked the door and held it open for Jessica. She smiled gratefully,

"Thank you for letting us stay with you, though if I remember correctly you live in a one bedroom flat." she raised an eyebrow at him and he laughed at her.

"Well in the past three weeks I have moved into a new five bedroom house, which is in fact to big for two people to live in, but Addy chose it and I couldn't resist her pleading eyes. Anyway it's on the new Barrett estate, just around the corner from where I used to live, you cant miss it, I live on Starachan Grove, number 7."Jessica laughed at him,

"Three weeks and she's already ruined. So sleeping arrangements wont be a problem?" She edged ever closer to him.

"Nope, Lucas can have his own room and Amelia can have her own room as well. And you can choose either to sleep in the last spare room or in the deluxe room in the roof master bedroom." He moved closer as well.

"As inviting as the spare room sounds I'd much rather be with you." She moved onto her tip toes and kissed him gently on the lips. He responded eagerly and leaned back against his desk wrapping his arms around her. The kiss seemed to last forever but was interrupted by a loud beeping sound. Adam sighed,

"Damn pager," He reached for it,

GET TO RESUS NOW. ITS URGENT.

He handed Jessica the keys,

"I have to go but I'll see you when I get home. Something's wrong,"

He ran from the room in a panic leaving a worried Jessica to wonder what was going on.

**Tell me if you enjoyed it or hated it, whichever, I have another chapter planned but I need at least three reviews! R&R please! xx**


	7. Different Types of Love

**I am so sorry I haven't updated sooner. I just forgot all about it and then I had end of year exams so this took a while to write. I am not totally happy with it but you can decide that yourselves. So here it is.  
I actually cannot wait for Casualty tonight! Thanks for all the comments x  
Enjoy!**

**Adam's Secret  
Different Types of Love**

Pain was blazing through my body reaching every last inch of it. I twisted and writhed in pain but I knew that no one could see me, that if I called out no one would hear me. There was something blocking my throat and it wouldn't let me breath. I opened my mouth but whatever it was choked me and fought back against my useless attempts at calling out. One arm was secured to my side and when I tried to lift the other a burning pain seared through my side and I felt like I was finished. I tried and tried to get it out but I couldn't. The blackness was fast approaching again and just when I thought it was over someone was calling my name.

"Addison, Addison, stay with us. You're going to be fine." I wrenched my eyes open and saw a familiar face. Mr Jordan. But where the hell was I? This wasn't where I remembered being when I was talking to Kelsey and that other guy. Jay I think he was called. The thing in my throat was gone and breathing came easily. Mr Jordan smiled.

"Welcome back Miss Trueman." My eyes adjusted to the light and I tried tot locate the one person I really wanted to see.

"Where's my dad? I want my dad!"

"_Jordan? What's going on?" His eyes swept the room finally fixing on the little girl in the bed. She was completely still and all heads in the room swivelled to look at him with sorrowful eyes. "What happened?"_

"_I'm sorry Dr Trueman, your daughter had a cracked rib that punctured her left lung. As it went undetected for so long we were not fast enough with the chest drain and Addison passed away a few seconds ago."_

Adam woke up covered in a cold, sticky sweat. He shifted the covers off his soaked form and stood up. He was in his room, Jessica was lying on the other side of the bed and for a moment he forgot himself and smiled but that moment was short lived as he remembered the dream he had just woken from. He crept to the door and down the stairs to the landing and quietly so as not to wake Lucas and Amelia he edged a door open, cringing at the squeak, and entered a dark room.

He crept over to the window and opened the curtains and blinds he had closed earlier that night. A little of the sky's early morning glow lit the room. The pale blue walls were illuminated and objects in the room became more noticeable. The bed was unmade and a teddy bear lay lopsidedly against the pillow. He picked the teddy up and lay on the bed with the bear in his hands and his head on the pillow. He inhaled deeply and the smelt smell of a strawberries and cream shampoo. He closed his eyes and remembered.

"_Dad? Can I have a hug?" Adam laughed._

"_Sure kiddo, come here." He pulled the dark haired girl onto his lap and cuddled her close. He could smell the strawberry and cream shampoo on her damp hair and pulled her closer._

"_I love you Addy." The girl lifted her head and smiled a familiar smile._

"_I love you too dad."_

A cold tear slid down his cheek and marked the pillow.

"I love you Addy, more than life itself." The phone at the side of the girl's bed rang once and Adam pounced on it determined not to make the other people in the house wake up.

"Hello?"

"Adam, it's Alex."

"Al? What's up?"

"I couldn't help myself, I went to the hospital an hour and a half ago."

"Alex you heard what they said. You were there.""I know but they were wrong."

"What do you mean they were wrong?"

"Adam, she's awake. She's been awake for two hours. Since half past four this morning in fact."

"I'm coming down there. Tell her I love her and I won't be too long." He paused and allowed relief to flood him. "Hey wait a minute. How did you get in at five o'clock in the morning?"

"I asked nicely and besides she was driving the nurses up the wall. All she wanted to do was to phone you. They didn't want to wake you so early. They were glad of a break."

"See you soon Al."

"Bye Adam."

Adam slammed the phone down and jumped off the bed. As quietly as he could he bounded up the stairs and burst into his room. He knelt beside Jessica and shook her lightly.

"Jess, Jess! Addy's awake!" Jessica's eyes flickered open.

"Really?" Adam smiled at her.

"Really." Jess sat up smiling. She threw her arms around Adam.

"That's great!" Adam pulled away and gently cupped her face with one hand and put another on her round tummy.

"She'll come home and then the baby will be born and we'll be a real family." Jessica smiled.

"I love you Adam."

"I love you too Jess, I've always loved you." Adam gave her a gentle kiss, tapped her nose gently with his finger and rushed off for a shower.

His hand curled around the door handle. His stomach churned he couldn't remember ever being this nervous. She was his daughter but it had been three days. Would she be any different from before the accident? Would she blame him for what happened? Would she be in any pain? He took a deep breath and pushed the door open.

"DAD!!!" Addy shouted. Alex swivelled around and saw his brother standing awkwardly near the door.

"Addy your dad's shy." Adam went bright red.

"I am not!" Addy giggled. The colour had returned to her cheeks and she was smiling cheekily. He thought back to yesterday when she was living off of a ventilator and a drip. What had happened to change all that so quickly. She leant her head to the side.

"What is with you? I thought you would have a least given me a hug by now!" Adam crossed the room and bent down to give her a gentle hug. Addy grabbed him and squeezed him tightly.

"I'm sorry dad. I didn't mean to scare you." Adam pulled away - with difficulty - and looked at his daughter. She had tears spilling down her cheeks.

"Hey, hey. No tears. The main thing is your alive and reasonably well all things considering. And you've something else other than worrying me half to death." Addy looked at him curiously.

"What? I thought I just lay there with my eyes shut while doctors prodded me." Adam smiled and looked at Alex who had remained silent.

"Alex hasn't been up this early since Christmas when he was eight and he wasn't even up till after six. He's made a new record." Alex looked outraged.

"I'll have you know I was up at half four the next Christmas but SOMEONE told me to go back to sleep because he was totally boring and pathetic!" Adam grabbed a pillow from the end of Addy's bed and smacked Alex in the face with it. Addy laughed as her dad and uncle play fought in front of her. She was laughing so hard she forgot about the stitches in her side - until her laughing brought her to earth with a bump.

"Ow," she said still giggling but holding her ribs just about where the drain had went in. "Laughing is painful." Adam stopped and frowned.

"No laughing then. I need you at home. You have to help Amelia and Lucas settle in." Addy's eyes lit up.

"I totally forgot they were moving in with us!" She turned to Adam confused. "What day is it? I forgot to ask." Adam smirked.

"Monday. You've bin out since Saturday around six-ish." Addy laughed.

"Ah well I had a nice sleep." Alex reached over and ruffled her messy waves of hair.

"Your dad almost had a heart attack when he went back to see you and you were in an operating theatre getting your lungs fixed." Adam's happy mood as deflated. He was flooded with guilt.

_I was too busy with Jessica to be there when my own daughter needed me._

Addy recognized the look on his face.

"Don't worry about it dad, you couldn't have done anything anyway. Mr Jordan would have kicked you out." Alex laughed.

"That's why I like Nick. He's the only one able to boss my brother about." Adam threatened him with a pillow and he cowered in his wheelchair comically. He yawned.

"I'm gonna head back. I'm tired." Adam laughed.

"Told you Addy he's rubbish at getting up early." He held the door open for Alex.

"So would you be if you weren't a doctor! I'll be back to see you later Addy!" Adam waved at him and shut the door yawning himself.

"How did you manage to pick this time in the morning to wake up? It's not even eight yet!" Addy shrugged.

"I always was a morning child. I was born at half past three in the morning. Anyhow, are Amelia and Lucas settling in alright just now?" Adam rolled his eyes.

"You'll be the death of me. Anyway Lucas and Amelia are getting on okay at home but I suppose they still miss their dad. Jess is doing her best for them. Sean is having them stay with him at the weekend. I think they're coming here after school today." Adam paused to think. "You'll have to phone Anna and the boys. They're very worried about you. Anna had her husband Mark up here yesterday to see how you were. He was upset as well and he's never met you!" Addy chuckled.

"I'll call in another hour, let them wake up and start getting ready for school." Addy's eyes sparkled. "I don't have to go to school!" She smiled delightedly. "You'll have to phone and tell them though or they'll think I've bunked off or something." Adam sighed.

"You could be a bit more worried about missing school you know. When I was younger I loved school." Addy raised her eyebrows at him. She knew all to well he had just blatantly lied to her.

"You're lying and you look exhausted." Adam laughed and yawned again. "Go get a coffee or something to wake you up. I'm not going anywhere." Adam laughed.

"It can wait. Anyway you look beat yourself. You've had far to much excitement for one morning. Calm down." Adam nudged her further down into the pillows and helped her get comfortable. Addy looked up at him and smiled.

"Dad?" Adam turned around.

"Yes kiddo?" Addy put on a serious face.

"I love you." Adam laughed and ruffled her hair.

"I love you too squirt."

A nurse bustled in suddenly and Addy jumped slightly.

"Well Miss Trueman it looks like you've calmed down since I was last in." The nurse smiled kindly and looked closely the girl lying in the bed. Then she frowned.

"I must say though you look very worn out. No doubt it's the excitement that your dad and uncle brought with them. Although I must now insist that you rest and maybe try and get another sleep. I am sure there will be all day to catch up on what you've missed out on but right now isn't a great time." the nurse finished her lecture and proceeded to take her blood pressure and pulse and everything else that Addy couldn't care less about.

"Nurse? When can I go home?" The nurse frowned again.

"I just told you that you have to rest. Not for a few more days but you will have to ask the doctor when he comes to see you. He shouldn't be too long." The nurse bustled out again and Addy turned her head to resume conversation with her dad and started to laugh.

He was slumped in his chair, worn out, asleep. Addy smiled, sat up and being careful of her side she leaned over and kissed her dad's cheek.

"I love you dad." She smiled. "And you sorted out the Jessica situation yourself. I am very proud of you."

_Elsewhere ….._

"Lucas! Come on you need to get up!" Jessica opened the door of her son's new room and found him sitting on his bed fully dressed looking mournfully at his shoes.

"Lucas? What's wrong sweetheart?" Lucas looked up and a tear rolled down his cheek.

"Mummy, do you love us?" Jessica laughed slightly.

"Of course I do! Why wouldn't I?" Lucas tried a smile.

"Daddy told us that you loved Mr Adam more than us and that when you have Mr Adam's baby you'll love that baby more than us." Jessica frowned.

"Lucas Anderson, listen to me. I love you and your sister more than anything in the world. Yes, I love Adam too but that's a different kind of love and I will love your little brother or sister but not anymore or any less than how I love you. You're still my baby Lucas and no matter what happens between your dad and I we both love you." Jessica ruffled his hair. "Are we okay now?" Lucas nodded and gave her a hug.

"Love you mum." Jessica nodded and wiped a tear off of his cheek.

"Now, let's go and see Amelia."

Amelia was sitting at the breakfast bar eating her cereal. She looked up when her mum and brother came into the room. She stood up and threw her arms around her mum.

"Mummy I love you. Please don't hate me." Jessica looked at her daughter startled and Lucas sighed at his older sister.

"I already asked her Mills." Amelia stepped back and looked at them again. "You don't hate us then?"

"Of course not Amelia. I could never ever hate you or Lucas. I love you both very much." Jessica kissed both of her children. "Now come and finish breakfast. Lucas all you have to do is put milk in your cereal." Jessica hurried around the kitchen in concealed anger. _How dare her? How could he do that to his own kids? I'm going to deal with this._ Putting the kids empty bowls in the dishwasher she straightened up and smiled.

"Right then. Time for school." Lucas groaned.

"Mum, do we have to go to school?" Amelia nudged his shoulder.

"I like school." Lucas rolled his eyes.

"You would." Jessica pushed them towards the front door.

"Come on now, no arguing. Remember you'll be going to see Addison after school so try and be out quickly."

"Addy." Amelia and Lucas corrected her. Jessica smiled. Amelia pulled on her jacket and sighed.

"If there is one thing I hate about school it has to be this uniform." Jessica laughed.

"It's a nice uniform." Amelia looked at her, eyebrows raised.

"I'd rather wear a uniform like Addy's. Adam was washing her jumper last night and it doesn't have a daft badge on it. Only her blazer does and she wears a school tie." Jessica pushed her daughter out the door.

"Well when you see her later I am sure you can ask her what she thinks of her uniform. Now it really is time for school."

**Please R&R when your done. I promise I will update sooner this time. I actually have the last chapter written. It was written before the first! This story has a while to go but do please R&R if I am to continue!**


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